Foolishly Fooled

Foolishly Fooled
I just can't help it
but I need to say that I really am.
No, I'm not really sure
But I suppose I'm playing the part of a crazy fool.
Has it been madness?
Has it been a desperate attempt
to claim something I thought I'll ever have?
And yet, something that will never be...
I am standing amidst the earth and sky
waiting for the time that lightnings will struck down
and finally take my last breath.
I am desperate for the last leaf to fall.
Well' I could say to the rain, take me...
Take me to the rivers where towards the abyss.
At least, the abyss can always be
a place where I will not have to mind my feelings
a place where I can be all by myself
a place away from all pretensions and false illusions
a place away from the very edge of what people say
and what I really wanted.
Things might change then and so do my feelings.
I cannot always be someone else.
I am just me.
I am foolishly fooled by what I felt.
I am foolishly fooled by myself.
I am foolishly fooled by the world.
And I know I can never avenge myself...
I know I'll just remain here
Trying to explain to myself why
and simultaneously deiscrediting such.
I have wished for the star
Even if I know that even the moon
wouldn't be mine...
I have saved myself with no reason at all
in order to be dealt upon by manic culprits
and stealer of contentment.
I'm no longer the best man I imagined myself to be.
All because I'm foolishly fooled.